Solace in the Seasons: Stuck in a World of Worry? Fall Into Gratitude!

I saw a funny meme that made me smile on this Facebook page “Quotes & Coffee.” It said:

“I’m so tired of worrying about everything, for everyone, every second of the day. But I’m also worried no one will worry as good [sic] as I do, about all the things that need worrying about.”

Sound familiar? I’ll bet it describes a lot of us — trying our best to cope with everything from struggles in our own lives to the chaos of a world that seems to have gone crazy, and reflexively worrying as if it could give us control.

It’s November, a month we mark with thanksgiving for the blessings we enjoy. Fall is in full swing, so I’m sharing a couple of poems about autumn and gratitude, hoping they bring you hope and peace wherever you are reading this.

The first one, “Gold in All Directions,” was inspired by the stunning scenery around our home in Sun Valley, Idaho. I enjoy seeing the autumn colors but missed them in 2022 due to ill health. So that year I started scrolling photos from the fall of 2020 and 2021 remembering, enriching, and absorbing the feeling of witnessing the majesty. Pulling up images from a happy time is a technique that I use to shift my mood, allowing the good memories to create new happy bridges in my brain.

It’s Autumn
A shift in palette
From sun-filled brights

Untold greens
Kelly to Viridian
Every complement of primary colors
Cadmium red and yellow light
Permanent Orange
Garish in its delight

Then a breeze creeps in
Thoughts of wool sweaters
Cozy flannel pajamas
Steaming mugs of tea

The landscape deepening
burnt sienna, umber
And gold, gold, gold.

The Quaking Aspen trees
Are not waiting for me
To witness their magic

Soon, they will exchange
their green coins for gold
A Goldilocks trick
Too whimsical to believe

If ill health prevents me from
Standing in the golden woods this season

It gives me solace to know
That it will happen again next year
And the year after that
And the year after
Regardless of my awe
in its presence

I’ve written often about all the benefits of practicing gratitude for physical, mental, and emotional health. But what if you are one of those professional worriers like the person who wrote the meme above? The good news is practicing gratitude (not just waiting until you feel grateful, but intentionally counting your blessings) reduces feelings of worry and anxiety, as shown in numerous studies. Some studies suggest a virtuous circle in which increasing gratitude leads to greater satisfaction with life, which fosters more gratitude.

You can encourage this cycle of gratitude by through simple practices like taking in the good and keeping a gratitude journal. World champion worriers, take heart: You can’t simultaneously feel gratitude and worry. You can give yourself a break from all the worry by taking a few deep breaths and thinking about all your blessings. It’s not about burying your head in the sand, but taking care of your own mental health.

I have agonized over the loss of innocent life since Hamas attacked Israel over two years ago. Like any caring human, I feel grief and even guilt over being safe while so many in our world suffer. I wrote this poem about moving from grief and guilt to gratitude, and share it hoping it brings you hope in this month of Thanksgiving:

The pressure builds up behind my eyes
Water that stings begins to leak
I open my mouth to let out a sigh

Feeling the feelings
Naming each of them
Grief — for every innocent life gone
Guilt — for not being able to do more
Gratitude — that I am safe

Moving from guilt to gratitude
is a long and bumpy road

I sit under the eaves to witness
what is present, to put me
on the path to gratitude

Steam wafts up from my bowl of oatmeal.
I smell cinnamon and peanut butter.
Be careful, it’s hot, he says.

I’m grateful my husband is
the morning oatmeal man.
So grateful he is alive and well,
and that we have each other.
All these decades of knowing
someone deeply, of being known
and accepted.